February 25, 2008 – Monday

Could today have sucked any worse than it did? Yes, I suppose if I had been hit by a bus.

Since my last blog I have had my hand pooped on by Sarah as I was wiping her after she jumped down off the potty, after much praise for peeing in it, so things do get better! (eh-hem sarcasm there)
I spent all of Sunday on this thing (stupid computer) and trying my best to ignore the kids because it’s “my day”. Spoiled rotten me, who can’t stand that my husband has a day off in the middle of the week and works Saturdays so I am alone with the kids and then Sundays we are both with the kids, and I don’t get a “day off”. Sob, sob, I know nobody has a violin tiny enough to be appropriate for my whining. So then the next day I felt bad because talking to a girl at work, her husband is from China, speaks broken English and works at a Chinese restaurant – even though he is educated and has a degree in China, it isn’t worth much here without speaking the language. He works 6 days a week and odd hours, and here she isn’t whining about her husband’s job, she is going back to school for nursing (while still working full-time) so that her husband won’t have to work 6 days a week for them to get by! And I am lucky my husband isn’t off in Iraq or something – I am such a whiney spoiled brat!
Completely off topic (well, more whining), I hate people who stop for you to cross the street or parking lot/driveway when you are not stepping into the crosswalk, just innocently standing there waiting for cars to pass until it is safe to cross. People should not do that! I had someone stop and wave me by and I’m like no thanks go ahead (waving them ahead), and they wave no, really cross, and I’m like well okay (thumbs up) thanks! and step off and look to the right and oh! well, there’s someone coming from the other direction who really wasn’t interested in stopping for a pedestrian but since I started they came to a halt just for little ole me. My point is – just drive will ya! It is the law to stop for pedestrians who are IN a crosswalk (who are stupid anyway if they just step out in the middle of traffic and should learn how to look both ways).
I still hate my job – it’s about enough work for a couple of people. Good thing I am good at multitasking, but it does wear me thin. I know I’ve been through this before, but every now and then I really need to list everything out because I think “do I reaaally do as much as I think I do??” and then when I see it all out there on the page (screen) I think, “Oh, yeah, I guess I do.” My officemate types reports and letters, fixes the edits, copies and sends them out, logs them in the chart, sends the charts to med rec for filing. She answers my phone sometimes when I’m not at my desk (off faxing, pulling charts, whatever) but big deal – she’s writes a message and leaves it for me! Thanks but no thanks, don’t waste your time, I really could’ve gotten the voicemail message when I got back. Hello! I used to do what she does AND prep charts, and enter stuff in the database, and take and follow up on messages, do RXs and PA’s, etc. (not just pass them off to the coordinator), and log metabolic results, and sort mail, and pull charts, file papers in the charts, and, and, and… It’s just irritating. So now I do all that stuff I used to do when I was in her seat, plus trying to intake new patients, pull, make, and prep charts (this means printing records from powerchart, faxing requests for records and insurance referrals from primary docs and records from all the specialists, making sure that we have any results we were waiting for or reports from referrals we made), schedule appts and send out appt letters (don’t even have time to call each patient to schedule or confirm appts – I just plug em in and send out letters), I have to keep track of when each patient seen needs to be put in for return visits, try to keep database up to date and now I have to do the quarterly grant reporting (which used to be done by the genetic counselor who left), have to schedule conference calls/meetings, and I’m trying to keep track of the daily genetics schedule, plus the monthly (at times 2 x a month) MD clinic, monthly metabolic clinic, 2 monthly ped CF clinics, 1 monthly adult CF clinic, plus do appt letters and records requests for Cleft palate clinic (which isn’t even my clinic), oh yeah order lunches for all of the monthly clinics, keep in touch with all the nurses, clinicians, and doctors involved in each of the different clinics and other support people and managers (like 30 different people I could communicate with about something on any given day.)
Anyway, Yah.
Great, it’s 11:30. I just wasted all this time bitching and I can’t remember what I was going to get on here and write. I should have spent time reading tonight. Or doing Sudoku. I looked in BDN and EMMC for jobs – none.
Does anyone else feel like all they do is work and sit at home on the computer or watching TV? Is this normal? Is this how each and every person spends their time – I think it’s called a rut – come home from work, fix supper (or watch kid – depending on whose turn to cook), sit at the computer, check myspace, listen to music, eat supper, sit at computer/watch TV/maybe something with the kid(s), then kid bedtime, then sit at computer/watch TV rest of night until you crash? Last couple nights I didn’t get on the computer but I watched TV instead till it was time to go to bed, then did Sudoku until I couldn’t keep my eyes open, and went to sleep. Then get up, get ready for work, work all day pissed off (I keep going back and forth between pissed off and going with the flow – depends on the day), then do it all over again. God, this is what adulthood is supposed to be like?? I hate it. I just hope my kids take advantage of the time they have before they have kids themselves and actually pave themselves the path in life that will make them happy and do something that they love to do so much that they can’t wait to get out of bed in the morning to do it. I drag my ass reluctantly out of bed every morning, partly because, well it is almost 12 and I’m not in bed yet, but I think mostly because I’m on the bumpy dirt path with the ruts.

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