I reveal the parts I want you to see;
you think you know me.
Ugly thoughts inside my head
you have never seen,
Mourning at the side of a haunted bed –
empty womb, hands of red,
I smile as though I had never thought
fondly of death like an old friend.
Do you wonder what names
have escaped my lips
In fits of passion,
screams of rage?
Call them God in darkened places,
no confusion of names or faces.
It penetrates my skin,
the electric heat of your hands.
There’s no mistaking it
You just don’t know.
Masquerade is what I do.
You count them on one hand;
I count them on two.
How can you tell that I love you?
Love, like hate, is a state of mind
at a point in time.
Tomorrow is another day
and the song will play,
“all that shimmers in this world
is sure to fade away…”*
as will you with time,
but I smile
and say I’ll love you forever.
You will always be mine.
I masquerade as the me
you think you know.
*quote – line from Shimmer by Fuel
moon reflects upon us
soon our fourth will rise
light of darkness leads us
night of crimson skies
rest upon its beauty
westward we shall wander
follow flaming sunset
swallow fate to ponder
fading paint on canvas
cascading fount of shade
pain’s eclipse deceives us
rains on our parade
moon will cast its shadows
soon the night will fall
bind us in our reverie
blind us in our thrall
(Who else has a blowjob version of a poem?)
If I could steal 15 minutes from your life
I could make you change all of your plans
Take 15 minutes of you from your wife
I could make you forget the touch of her hands
If I could spend 15 minutes in your arms
You would never want to let me go
Cast 15 minutes’ bewitching charms
My name would be the only one you’d know
If I could have 15 minutes for myself
I can’t think of what I’d rather to do
If I could put 15 minutes up on a shelf
I’d save them for when I could be with you
You drive toward the sun
to broaden your horizons
I say I can’t see you
getting any brighter
going to California
you think dark sunglasses
make you look cool
they hide the cold gaze
of glazed eyes
that see the world revolve
in shades of gray
dark clouds hover above
our heads in the rain
distant smell of ashes
and sounds of singing
ring around the rosies
echo as we all fall
down in the middle
of the dirt road
stuck in a rut we dug
our own grave
we dig our way out
climb toward the sun
and broaden our horizons
from the highest peak
everything is clear
FILLING SPACE (people-watching in a crowded cafeteria) by Laurie Frisbey
I fade into the background
become the walls around me
as they surround me
You seem to see right thru me
I’m an apparition watching
from the corner of the room
listening to the din of voices
many conversations blend
in static hum of white noises
words just empty space fillers
as in this room I seem to be
I watch your aimless wandering,
phony gestures, forced smiles,
opening your cans of laughter
do you really enjoy this place
or are you just here filling space
within the entropy of my head?
are you real or fabricated by
a lonely corner of the mind
of this apparition filling space
in your make-believe world?
They all were sorry to hear of his death,
all except for ‘lizabeth.
She cried herself to sleep that night
tears of relief from years of fright
and disbelief, for she had said
on many nights, “I wish him dead,”
and now in a cold, dark grave he lay.
Someone above had heard her pray,
and saved her from the wretched sin
of this ‘good man’, a monster within,
of a seven year-old, which lingered on
until that crash, and he was gone.
A teenage girl could then be free
of fear, but she would always see
the haunting visions of the past.
The anger and pain inside would last.
A promise is a leaf
which floats on the wind
once genuine, loving words held strong
now fallen from careless limbs
like a leaf, it crumbles.
The treasures that I found in you
seemed all of silver and gold
but inside every treasure chest
is a story yet untold
and love as deep as the ocean
may hold many treasures to explore
but sunken hearts
and tarnished coins of trust
will always wash ashore.
CONTEMPLATION (If I’d heard of emo when I was in high school…)
your words slap my wounded soul,
this tender spirit you bludgeoned
not so long ago
from within, a whisper
kill me, just kill me now
as droplets trickle down
my cheeks, then stream
my head screams
a chorus of confusion
disharmony drowned out
by my own sharp solo of sobs
I close my eyes, flooded
flashing images in darkness
of places and people I have known
but who cares now
who will notice when I am gone
A TRIP TO WAL-MART
He should’ve bought a clue
to think before he speaks,
but she swears she sees the people greeter
hand them out for free
with smiley face stickers for children
he can be such a jerk, she thinks
but she doesn’t speak
why don’t you realize
that when you piss me off
I am not really pissed
but holding back tears
tears triggered by hurtful words
but he doesn’t find that clue
oh how salty tears sting
in the bath towel section
when she tries to dry her eyes
again, he makes her cry
and that is why she grabs a soda
standing in the check-out line
to pay for towels she doesn’t need
she drinks to hide her eyes
behind the bottle
look, here’s a clue
for the next time you begin to spew,
but she doesn’t speak.
Well, I just don’t know what to write today
I don’t know why I write anyway
I guess I thought I had something to say
There’s only so much that one can convey
about our main topic of correspondence
without sounding redundant
Oh, I don’t know, one day we could meet
Maybe then our lives would be complete
or our bond of souls would deplete
and meeting would defeat
the purpose of the fantasy we’ve created
There’s only so much that we can say
about the purpose of our mutual existence
without sounding redundant
IN THE FOREST
through the delicate leaves
casting dappled light
onto the rocks and grass
twinkling as the breeze
gently sways the branches
While the water lies still
like a sheet of glass
reflecting the clear blue sky
as an eagle soars above
it ripples briefly
with a sudden gust
we lie in the grass
in the warmth of the forest
under a canopy of green
we fulfill our lust
WHEN I GROW UP
(Warped ideas of future goals possibly due to watching too many soap operas as a child)
At times when I was young
I imagined what I would be today
and whether I would be in Maine
or if I’d move away
Would I be a criminal
a cunning jewel thief
a bank robber, a murderess
inflict many a mother’s grief
Would I be a prostitute
another dirty whore
or night lady of eloquence and class
expensive to adore?
Would I end up a common wife
with picket fence and chain
pull my needs, like weeds
from the other side
spill my blood to ease their pain
Would I be a woman free
to while away the day
travel, drink, write, and love
with whomever I wish to play
Would I be a movie star
for all the world to see
for everyone to know my name
immortal I would be
I only have one chance on earth
so I thought I would decide
to take a taste of every life
at least on the inside
I am the shadow
outside your shower
open the curtain
I am gone
You can almost see me
in a crowd of nameless
I am the one
standing still and tall
above them all
as you walk toward me
then I fade
I am the ghost watching
as you lie in bed
the memory of my words
and your hands
wishing I would appear
from that dark corner of your room
and come to you
I am so close
yet miles away
just out of reach
you could touch me
if you could just see my eyes
look through them
they would pull you
into my soul
If you could hear
the sound of my voice
you could close your eyes
and carry me there
right next to you
but I will always be
just out of reach
His sparkling eyes upon me rest
His flaxen waves upon my breast
His warm, sweet breath upon my ear
He whispers words I long to hear
His face I know but cannot see
He is my cherished fantasy
He lives in my dreams and mine alone
I am his queen and he, my drone
I am his maiden and he, my sire
He is my burning heart’s desire
He stirs the embers, lights my fire
And these words he did inspire.
LOVE AND DARKNESS
an incandescent crescent hangs above
painted on a canvas of velvet sky
do you hear me cry
as I desperately pull your voice from the breeze?
almost inaudible, you tease.
i run to you as you call to me
from within the trees
skeletons whose awakened souls plead
to be put to rest
a love put to the test
our passions attract and souls collide
together we ride
a wave of ecstasy
I guide you, swallow you
into the deep sea
of my sweet darkness
my carnal caress
and abysmal love
you whisper my name
my heart you claim
your mind and mine merge on this night
of our imminent flight
into each other’s souls
i reach for you and you erase my tears
Excuse me, but, I don’t suppose
it would be too much
for me to ask you to propose?
I don’t want to impose
but you know we’ve been together
long enough to have a baby
I’d say it’s time to get this horse
and carriage on the road
Everywhere I turn
It’s white and lace
and I have to face
the fact that it’s not me
it’s her, and her,
and that one there
and where is my turn?
It burns inside, this yearn
for more than temporary
I’ve earned it from you
a permanent bond
contrary to what you may think
I’ve learned to wait
but why should I?
LADY IN THE NIGHT
Her footsteps echoed on the pavement
Each step sliced the silence of an October night.
The bite of crisp air chilled his bones
but her presence thrilled his heart with fright.
He walked a little faster hoping
his imagination was running wild,
but her footsteps quickened, then he turned
to face her as she stopped and smiled.
He thought, Oh what a lovely lass
I hope my fear did not offend.
He returned her smile, with a nervous nod
then continued the path around the bend.
The shortcut home was through the trees
and beyond the cemetary gate.
How strange this woman following-
what brought her out to walk so late?
At the gate, he stopped as she approached,
“And why in darkness do you roam?”
She said she had craved a midnight snack
and that she was now heading home.
She said, “Unfortunate news for you,
I failed to find a suitable treat,
until I saw you come along
and quicken your pace with frightened feet.”
“You see”, she said, “I could smell your fear,
it was stronger than your blood so warm.
What I love even more than the feed itself,
is the stirring of the human storm.”
So it would be wise, if you suspect
you are stalked by a creature of the night,
show no emotion and hold your ground,
let them not detect the sweet smell of fright.
Shrouded in darkness deep, I crouch
in my own little corner of the world.
Crystal tears fall from my face
As I silently wish I could return.
In my own little corner of the world,
only in dreams may I kiss his lips.
My Michigan prince, he waits for me
as I wonder at our uncertain fate.
Crystal tears fall from my face.
I reach for him and he fades away,
but in my mind he stays with me.
He wipes my tears with gentle hands,
as I silently wish I could return
to the beautiful place we did create,
he patiently waits for only me
like a tree waiting for the thaw of spring.
Only in dreams may I kiss his lips.
I close my eyes and I am swept away,
to a place full of love, his soft caress
and then on waking, sadness reigns
My Michigan prince, he waits for me
as I wonder at our uncertain fate.
Crystal tears fall from my face.
I reach for him, and he fades away.
ON BUTTERFLY WINGS
He sends me kisses on butterfly wings
like none I have ever seen before.
Their beauty exceeds that of any creature
created and bound to wander this earth.
Their wings patterned with detailed symmetry
and intricately placed unearthly colors
non-existent in our spectrum of light.
Irridescent shades reminiscent of purples
sparkling, with metallic flecks they change,
with every delicate movement of flight.
This particular butterfly flutters around me
as I walk and even now in the chill of fall,
this one circles around amongst the flakes
of an early first snow fall of the year.
I stop to kneel in the leaves on the ground.
They crunch under me and some are lifted,
sent skittering on the November breeze.
A butterfly lands on the back of my hand.
It withstands the cold, a surprising sight
like the kiss he sent so gentle and strong.
It came to me, tangible, yet as if from a dream.
It will survive the roughest winds of life.
Everchanging, it leaves me in pure amazement
and wonder at it’s whimsical existence.
There’s a song in my heart
I wrote just for you.
The music plays on
the whole night through.
We dance under stars
in the light of the moon.
We’ll dance in the daylight
perhaps one day soon.
The beautiful melody
flows through my soul,
And when our hearts join
our harmony is whole.
Our hearts beat in unison,
our souls sing as one,
And we’ll dance on forever
in the light of the sun.
AND THEN WE KISSED
I saw you in the crowd
and my heart melted…
and I couldn’t breathe…
Our eyes met
and the butterflies flew…
We looked at each other
and a melody filled my soul……
The crowd parted quietly
as you filled my vision…
The murmurs faded
as I walked towards you…
My heart skipped a beat
at your closeness…
Your beautiful smile
filled me with desire……
I took your hand lightly
and my body trembled…
My lips quivered as we touched
and our souls linked tenderly…
My eyes gazed deeply into yours
as we danced slowly to the music…
In harmony with each other
and connected in mind and body…..
The music ended but still we danced
our hearts singing the songs of love…
The never ending rhythm of our passion
carried us like clouds across the floor…
The wondrous notes swirling above our heads
as we held each other for eternity……
And then we kissed……
I gaze lovingly at smiling eyes in my fuzzy picture of you
Longing for the day my fingertips can caress your cheeks
I touch your paper face and smile and my eyes begin to tear
My thoughts turn to daydreams, and my daydreams deepen
My dreams at night are created from the wishes my heart holds
Throughout the day, my wishes to be with you and of what we would do
I envision the first time we meet, the first tender kiss, warm embrace
The first time I look into your eyes face to face, as we dance, as we make love
I arrive on your doorstep trying to muster the boldness to knock on your door
Hoping to see your face, I wonder, “Will he answer? Will he be home?”
The door opens before me and there you stand… we are speechless
Our eyes lock as we stand there penetrating each other’s souls without a word
Barely comprehending that we are there together, in the flesh,
In a sudden rush we both smile and laugh and embrace
My arms flung around your neck, you lift me up and kiss me
My legs wrapped around your waist, you carry me inside in your strong arms
Never breaking our kiss, our passion deepens, our love strengthens
With each passing moment and with each caress our fire burns stronger
I place my feet once again on the ground and dance with you
Slowly to the music, we sway as our desire grows with each breath
Closely we dance to the music of our souls to the rhythm of our hearts,
We gaze into each other’s eyes and we know how far we want to go
All we want is to be one, to unite our bodies as we have our souls
At this moment in time all that matters is us and our eternal love
And so our lovemaking begins, it truly began with the bond we created
When we met not in person, but in words, when our hearts first spoke
When our souls first intertwined and you entered my dreams, these dreams
That carry me through the night and may one day carry me to your door.
A RITUAL OF GODS
I gaze into those hazel eyes in my pictures of you, from time to time
I read the beautiful words you write just for me, and no one else
Maybe I’m just naive, but I want nothing more than to make love to you
I want you to make love to me, more than anything, that’s all I want to do
As we begin to dance, I want you to hold my hands in yours
Against your chest, between our bodies, to feel the beat of our hearts
To know that you are real, I want to stand face to face with you for the first time
Put my arms around you, feel your arms around mine
I say I love you, and you whisper those words at the exact moment I do
A tender kiss for the first time, as a song of everlasting love plays soft and slow
I want to feel the electricity as your lips mesh gently with mine
I want to look into your eyes so loving, honest, and kind
Our embrace and our kiss grows more passionate as our bodies still move
Slowly, in time with our song as wandering hands slide down our backs
In a seemingly choreographed dance of their own, a loving caress
I let you know I am yours, as against the rigidness of your body I press
I drape my arms around your shoulders, and you give me a boost
I wrap myself around you, as we are still locked in our exploration of mouths
You kiss the side of my neck, my throat, my chin, then our eyes meet once again
Mine tell you where I wish you to carry me, I want only this moment, to be in your bed
Little by little, as fingertips and tongues explore, we strip each other down
To our animal selves, until naked we stand and you place me on your pillows
Soft sighs escape our mouths, as we plant sweet kisses all over our bodies in turn
Each of us giving and receiving all that we have to give in return
We consume each other fully, what our bodies have been craving for so long
Hungry, we devour each other’s skin imbibing each other’s tastes and scents
Kisses placed on every inch, every crevace, leaving no stone unturned
Butterflies flutter, as our passion and senses heighten, as our fires burn
Your heat finally enters mine, finally finding it’s home as we melt together
Our rhythm, our dance becomes a ritual of gods as waves of flames overtake us
Becoming one, one soul we unite, as one body for eternity we become
Our love reaches it’s precipice and to our ultimate pleasure we come
Holding tightly to one another, we plunge into our sweet abyss of oblivion
Yet each fiery jolt through our bodies lifts us higher than we have ever been
We have long lost all connection with the outside world, with reality
Together we quiver, as your thrust deepens within, flooding me
Reverberating sighs, and moans echo into the night, our senses awakened
Throughout the night, we share our hearts and our bodies
The scent of our passion ever lingering on each other’s skin
We settle into a contented embrace until again we are ready to begin.