I love S, but so often I honestly feel like I’m just marking time waiting for her to grow up so I can have a life. I am not enjoying raising her.
*Edit: Please understand, it’s been a long school vacation week – just a taste of what it will be like during the summer except the weather will be nicer then… And Ron having to work 13 hours (at a week’s notice) and no dayhab because of the holiday yesterday really took a toll on me. But yes, generally, honestly, caring for S. is not a fun time for me – it really is not. It’s kind of a bitch. But I’m doing it the best that I can. Mainly, I have to stop being resentful and instead enjoy the time I DO have to myself and when I say I’m going to take off for the day (like I had planned to on Thursday and didn’t, then Saturday and didn’t), I need to just do it, relax, and take care of my own needs more.